Does Prada make flip flops?
What does this mean?
And what does it have to do with gardening?
It’s just a little insight into my friend Paree, who asked me this question the other day.
She asked me this question just before she asked me for a little help with her garden.
The answer to the first question is yes, Prada does make flip flops. I found two different pairs at Bluefly for 20% off. One pair is $260.00 and the other pair is $224.00. What a deal! You go Sex in the City girl.
As for me, I buy flip flops in bulk at Long’s Drugs.
The answer to the second question, will you help me with my garden was, of course!
I asked Paree “What would you like to see in your garden? Do you have something in mind?”
She said she wanted it to look nice. But, because she didn’t enjoy gardening and she really didn’t have the time to devote to it, that she wanted a low maintenance garden.
“Well,” said I, “we can do a low-maintenance garden for you, but remember, Low maintenance does not mean no maintenance.”
“You will have to get out there sometimes and do things like fertilizing, weeding, trim, replace plants and mulch. The guys that mow and blow can’t do everything.”
“Mulch?” she said. Starring at me with a blank expression. Paree slowly spoke, “Let me rephrase that…I want a no maintenance garden.”
I looked back at her and said, “How do you feel about rocks?”
Every garden needs maintenance.
Repeat after me. Every garden needs maintenance. Even low maintenance gardens.
Have you ever driven down a street and seen a garden that looks neglected? It probably looked great at one time, but now looks rangy and sparse or overgrown and messy.
Those lawn care guys can only do so much. They’re good at trimming though.
You’ve seen them. You know what I mean—those poor Pittosporum that are lopsided, with big leaveless holes, but are trimmed very neatly. The ones with bare, hard earth underneath them.
The sad Boxwoods whose dead branches have even been trimmed into a ball.
Nandina sheared to look like lollipops standing in acres and acres of ivy.
And the Junipers, oh the junipers, oh the pain. I remember as a kid playing tag and running away from the person who was “it” and tripping and falling head first into a juniper bush. Hated them ever since.
Sorry. Every garden needs to be cut back, fertilized, and mulched.
New plants need to be added and old plants ripped out. It’s the cold hard truth. You will need to give even the most self-sustaining yard a little TLC.
Do this and your garden will love you for it.
And you will love your garden.
And if you don’t want to do it Paree, I can do it for you, or, I have included some very nice pictures of no-maintenance gardens. Just don’t walk across them in your Prada flip-flops.
If any of these pictures are of your garden, just contact me at Gardeners Anonymous. We need to talk.
On the one hand, I think the idea of replacing old plants, planting new ones, fertilizing and mulching sound good. On the other hand, the rocks also look attractive and make great toys for the kids. I have to think about this awhile. In the meantime, have to return the Prada flip flops to Saks because they are made too small for my giant feet and they cost way too much, especially since I have an added expense of new flowers or rocks.
Posted by: Paree | April 04, 2007 at 01:47 PM
Paree, go to bluefly. They have Prada flip-flops at 15% of their already marked down price. The flip flops are available in size 10.5. This way you can afford the shoes and the rocks.
If your feet are bigger than 10.5, check out REI. They're having a sale on Canoes.
Posted by: chigiy | April 04, 2007 at 04:56 PM
I am in awe (or shock) that such "landscapes" actually exist someplace.
It's like they are on another planet. My favorite is the one with the turquoise trim.
I can't stop from staring at these pictures. Can't stop from staring...
Posted by: Carol | April 04, 2007 at 05:17 PM
Carol,
The turquoise trim one is my favorite too. It's like they were really trying to make their rocks look good.
I was actually going to do a book on the worst landscapes I've ever seen. I'm not kidding. I took these pics about 7 months ago for that particular purpose.
Your right they do look like they are from another planet. The planet of Lazy Tacky.
Posted by: chigiy | April 04, 2007 at 08:12 PM
Chigiy, it's a good thing there's an REI in Austin - but where to find High heel canoes?
The turquoise one is sprightly, at least... the one with murdered boxwood and pittosporum is too painful to look at. And the photos sure reinforce what movies, literature and older relatives have told us: "California is weird!"
Annie at the Transplantable Rose
Posted by: Annie in Austin | April 05, 2007 at 07:53 PM
I'm with Carol -- can't stop staring. What amazing and chilling photographs. And yet, I also resonate with the idea of the rocks being endless entertainment for the kids. To be honest, I'm just relieved not to see the front of my house included in the lineup....
By the way -- do you have a weed whacker I could borrow sometime? I know it's gonna take a lot more than a weed whacker, but I've got to start somewhere.
Jacqueline
Posted by: Jacqueline | April 06, 2007 at 08:56 AM
Jacqueline,
I need a weed whacker badly.
Maybe we could split one.
Posted by: chigiy | April 06, 2007 at 08:57 PM
*shudder* er.. what lovely gardens.. NOT!
I too remember juniper, and I also hate it! We lived in LA for a short time, and the back garden had a pool, with a giant juniper bush next to it. Walking barefoot on the falling foliage was VERY uncomfy! I've ever since disliked all conifers.
Posted by: Silvia / Salix | April 08, 2007 at 01:37 AM
Annie, for high heel canoes I would try Any Mountain or perhaps go online to Sierra Trading Post.
As for California being weird, your right it is, that's what I love about it, with the exception of these "no-maintenance gardens"-icky.
Posted by: chigiy | April 08, 2007 at 10:25 AM
Silvia,
I remember walking across the falling foliage too, kinda like walking across cactus needles.
Can you imagine walking barefoot across these beautiful rock lawns? How pleasant.
Posted by: chigiy | April 08, 2007 at 10:29 AM
Oh my ... these pics remind me of my neighbour's garden - or lack thereof. The shrubs are hacked to within an inch of their lives, and the rest of the yard is covered in rocks. If one bit of green dares pop out, well Round-up is at the ready. thankfully there is a high fence... and all the butterflies come to my garden instead.
Posted by: kate | April 08, 2007 at 02:34 PM
Planet Lazy Tacky. I LOVE IT.
Posted by: Genie | April 10, 2007 at 06:06 PM
Chigiy - I grew up in AZ with a front yard made up of entirely white and green rocks! I'm branching out this year and have planted green beans and cucumbers....my red pepper plant has been completely eaten alive by some sort of critter....not too happy about that!
Posted by: Kren T | June 02, 2007 at 09:17 PM
Karen,
Oooo, White and green rocks. I wish I had a picture of that.
Your pepper plant is probably being eaten by earwigs or snails. If you plant it in a pot first until it is big enough to outgrow the critter this will give it a fighting chance.
Posted by: chigiy | June 03, 2007 at 12:56 AM
That turquoise and white house is certainly riveting! Nothing looks lazier than a low maintenance yard that isn't maintained; note the bright green weeds in amongst the white rocks.
Posted by: teresa | July 09, 2008 at 05:38 PM
That turquoise and white house is certainly riveting! Nothing looks lazier than a low maintenance yard that isn't maintained; note the bright green weeds in amongst the white rocks.
Posted by: teresa | July 09, 2008 at 05:39 PM
I agree -- I live in the midwest, so gardening is a regular task for us, particularly since I love it. There is a man nearby who was having problems with moles, so what did he do? He dug up the entire section of grass and covered it with plastic and rocks? Does he think that the moles won't travel to another area of his yard? Hmmm. Why don't these people talk to me first (hahaha). That's something my hubby gets very tired of hearing. When I see something that looks like it's a BAD IDEA, I just wish I had had the opportunity to have a chat with them before than began -- not that I'm an expert in everyone's eyes, but pretty darn close! I'm having so much fun here!
Posted by: Jan | April 24, 2010 at 02:13 PM
This is so bizarre. I was looking for a picture of an azalea and google sent me here. I got interested in your writing - very clever - and then read about you. I too grew up in Los Gatos and used to live in the Santa Cruz mtns. with 2 young daughters. Have since moved on. Keep up the fun blog - you have talent.
Posted by: Carolyn Shank | April 06, 2011 at 06:01 PM
The strange thing for me Carolyn is I used to have a very good friend who's name was Carolyn Shenck. It sounded the same. Thank you for visiting.
Posted by: chigiy | April 06, 2011 at 06:35 PM
Haha! Hilarious!! I also hate juniper! Especially the phallic shaped numbers. Paree's response was great. How is her yard doing BTW??
Xo
Posted by: kimmy | April 19, 2011 at 01:10 PM
Hi Kim,
Paree and the rock yards gave me a lot to write about. The part of Paree's yard that I worked on looks great, haha
Posted by: chigiy | April 19, 2011 at 08:46 PM
I am requesting permission to use some of your photos for a xeriscape presentation I am dong soon. I can make reference to the photographer if you provide that. I need photos of rocked yards with no or minimal plants.
Posted by: Joan | October 05, 2011 at 08:38 PM