Does Prada make flip flops?
What does this mean?
And what does it have to do with gardening?
It’s just a little insight into my friend Paree, who asked me this question the other day.
She asked me this question just before she asked me for a little help with her garden.
The answer to the first question is yes, Prada does make flip flops. I found two different pairs at Bluefly for 20% off. One pair is $260.00 and the other pair is $224.00. What a deal! You go Sex in the City girl.
As for me, I buy flip flops in bulk at Long’s Drugs.
The answer to the second question, will you help me with my garden was, of course!
I asked Paree “What would you like to see in your garden? Do you have something in mind?”
She said she wanted it to look nice. But, because she didn’t enjoy gardening and she really didn’t have the time to devote to it, that she wanted a low maintenance garden.
“Well,” said I, “we can do a low-maintenance garden for you, but remember, Low maintenance does not mean no maintenance.”
“You will have to get out there sometimes and do things like fertilizing, weeding, trim, replace plants and mulch. The guys that mow and blow can’t do everything.”
“Mulch?” she said. Starring at me with a blank expression. Paree slowly spoke, “Let me rephrase that…I want a no maintenance garden.”
I looked back at her and said, “How do you feel about rocks?”
Every garden needs maintenance.
Repeat after me. Every garden needs maintenance. Even low maintenance gardens.
Have you ever driven down a street and seen a garden that looks neglected? It probably looked great at one time, but now looks rangy and sparse or overgrown and messy.
Those lawn care guys can only do so much. They’re good at trimming though.
The sad Boxwoods whose dead branches have even been trimmed into a ball.
Nandina sheared to look like lollipops standing in acres and acres of ivy.
And the Junipers, oh the junipers, oh the pain. I remember as a kid playing tag and running away from the person who was “it” and tripping and falling head first into a juniper bush. Hated them ever since.
Sorry. Every garden needs to be cut back, fertilized, and mulched.
New plants need to be added and old plants ripped out. It’s the cold hard truth. You will need to give even the most self-sustaining yard a little TLC.
Do this and your garden will love you for it.
And you will love your garden.
And if you don’t want to do it Paree, I can do it for you, or, I have included some very nice pictures of no-maintenance gardens. Just don’t walk across them in your Prada flip-flops.
If any of these pictures are of your garden, just contact me at Gardeners Anonymous. We need to talk.